I have been trying really hard to clear my head at night so I can sleep. I’ve found a channel on Dish Network that plays soothing music. It’s called “Dreamscapes”. It works for about five minutes and then things start popping into my head:
- did I pay the water bill?
- what is going to happen to my sons?
- I wonder how the home equity loan is coming along.
- did I close the windows downstairs?
- I really need a box of wine.
- what was that noise?
It’s like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man on Ghostbusters …. no matter how hard I try to clear my mind, the things that will destroy me just keep popping up.
When I find myself in that same boat, which is pretty often, I PRAY. I find that when I turn it all over to God, my worries and fears seem to fade.
April recently posted..Easter 2012
I do that too !
i love Mr. Stay Puft. when i was a kid, i used to wish i was there when he got blown up, just so i could have blown up toasted marshmallow creme all over me. the real Stay Puft marshmallows actually have caffeine in them. sorry none of that has anything to do with your actual post.
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…. and now I am craving hot chocolate
I count backwards from 1000. One time I got all the way down to the 300s but usually I fall asleep by the time I get into the 800s.
Really enjoy reading your blog. So sorry about what you are going through. I said this many times during my daughters’ teenage years, “I’d kill them if I didn’t love them.” Parenthood, it isn’t for the weak that’s for sure.
Hang in, you will get through this.
Thank you … we are taking it one day at a time.
I do that too!! Except I start at 100. There have only been one or two times when I got to one and wasn’t asleep so I started over at 1000.
I have struggled with sleep for a lot of years. Your description is spot on. Back when I had cable, I liked the weather channel.
maggie S. recently posted..Come On In! Don’t Look at the Mess.
When I was going through withdrawal, I had horrible sleeping problems and I learned that the worst thing to do was stay in bed and think about how I wasn’t sleeping. I have read many books in the middle of the night.