I wish sometimes that I had this attitude:
I used to have that attitude about people when I was bat shit crazy on meds and vodka. I really didn’t care whether or not people actually liked me … but was under the strange illusion that everybody did and that I was everybody’s best friend, even though I treated people horribly, yelled at them constantly, and sometimes threw things in their general directions. Oh yes … I was real fun to be around.
I really don’t know where this post is going other than to say that I am having a hard time finding the balance between wanting to be liked (and finding new friends) and not caring whether somebody likes me (and moving on if they don’t want to be my friend). I tried to force friendships during the crazy days and that just ended up pushing people away, so now I am scared to put myself out there. I want the closeness of friendships, but come across as socially awkward and borderline stalkerish.
I need more practice being liked (in a genuine not “please please please be my friend” kind of way).
I met a woman last night at a blogger meet up who said that she had really gotten to the point where she didn’t give a shit what people thought of her or what she had to say, she was set on speaking her mind.
And I had to stop and think about that idea. And it wasn’t long before I said, “Yeah, but we have to draw a line somewhere. Otherwise, we just come off as being offensive all the time.” She didn’t agree with me, I think. She left soon after that.
Whatever.
I’ve been there. I’ve done it. I draw the line in some cases, and let my opinion fly in others. But I think a level of discretion is necessary in a LOT of cases. And if we didn’t care about what people thought about us at all, well…I think we’d all be great, big messes all the damned time!
And I prefer elegance over messiness. Just a personal preference there. (Elegance with a side of sass, anyway. I can be elegant and still say cuss words, right? I hope so!)
Faith recently posted..::jazz hands::
I agree that there has to be a balance between caring so much that we never leave the house because people might be mean to us and not caring so much that we leave the house and are mean to other people. I just have to find that balance.
Balance is the difficult piece of the whole friendship puzzle. Just keep on being yourself.
BTW, I blurted out laughing at the “poster” that you began this post with. OMG…too funny.
Cristy recently posted..Some Things Never Fail