I received a message this morning that has made me sad beyond sad. The niece of a good friend from high school and I have been having conversations for months about mental health, overall health, and stress. She’s a very young single mother, working two jobs, with a drug addicted deadbeat ex who doesn’t pay child support or help her with her boys in any way. She’s beyond stressed.
A discussion about a month ago turned to my struggle with prescription medications and my journey to be free of them and live a more content life. She told me that she could never be off of medication because anxiety and depression run in her family (her mother, her aunt, and her brother have all been on meds for as long as I can remember). Well I was told the same thing my entire life too and you know how that turned out. You also know that I would never ever tell somebody that they shouldn’t take something that they believe is working for them. However, I do tell people to watch for side effects and to tell their love ones to watch for the side effects that they can’t see themselves (mainly personality changes like I had that I could NOT see until I woke up in a jail cell).
The message I received this morning basically said that she can’t be around people right now and most days can’t get out of bed. Obviously something isn’t working. I just sent back a message of love and support along with my cell number telling her that she could call or text me anytime. That’s all I can do for now.
But I can’t pretend that it doesn’t make me mad …. beyond mad in fact … whatever beyond mad would be … I don’t know … maybe wanting to scream and hit things with sticks and scream while hitting things with sticks. It makes me mad that she had been prescribed pill after pill after pill and then has those pills changed again and again and again because her doctore doesn’t realize that there are start up side effects and cold turkey withdrawal side effects. She needs a break right now, not another pill, but I don’t know how to convey that to her or if I should even try. So I will do what I can and offer support without preaching and maybe help her find a good therapist who specializes in CBT not a prescription pad.