My 229 1/2 pound dust bunny

I have had this strange spot in my mouth for about two weeks now. I went to the dentist about it last week and he was pretty sure that it wasn’t cancer – just a traumatized salivary gland (how the heck did a salivary gland get traumatized anyway – did it witness a murder that I am not aware of? – maybe it wasn’t hugged enough as a child? who knows). The dentist wanted the other dentist in the office to look at it this week as a second opinion. When dealing with cancer and things of that nature – I concur – I don’t want somebody to just be pretty sure. I want them to be beautiful sure !

So on Thursday I left work early enough to drive all the way back home to pick up D. I wanted him with me just in case the dentist wasn’t beautifully sure that it was a trivial issue. It was a pretty uneventful day for me up until that point in time. I called the house and told Rachel to make sure that daddy was ready to go when I got there because we didn’t have any time to spare. She said that he was outside working on something but that he was dressed and ready to go. Him tinkering on things while killing time is never a good thing. NEVER.

When I got home he was in fact ready but he was laughing. Also never a good sign. He told me that while he was waiting for me he went out and looked around the back yard just to see if there was anything that needed to be fixed. Something small. Something that he could fix quickly. The dryer vent has never really sat right in the hole on the outside so he decided that this was the perfect moment to tackle that project. He had just had a shower and was supposed to be patiently waiting yet he decides that the lopsided dryer vent could not wait one moment longer.

D has been shaving his head for years. It’s a lot easier to maintain plus he sweats like a water buffalo so having a bald head is cooler for him. Well he hadn’t shaved his melon in a few days so he had some head stubble going on. Combine this with the fact that it was pushing 95 degrees outside, the fact that the man can’t even cross the threshold of the house without sweat beads popping up on his forehead, and the fact that the dryer was running while he was trying to fix the vent and you get the picture. The good news is that the dryer vent is now repaired. The bad news is that he had already picked all of the dryer lent out of his head stubble and off of his glistening face before I got home and had the chance to take a picture.

Men – can’t live with them and they won’t take pictures of themselves doing stupid stuff so that you can post it on the Internet.

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