how to voice your needs
Simplify Your Self

Simplify by Speaking Up

Wishing you’d expressed your views so you wouldn’t be forced to go along with something you really didn’t want to do or agree with?  Wishing you’d voiced your opinion or stood up for someone else when they were being treated poorly?

Didn’t feeling like that make your life more complicated in some ways?

That’s how I was feeling Sunday morning.

Since we’ve been staying home on the weekends for the past few months we’ve been in a pretty predictable routine.  I’m always up early (usually before six) even on the weekends.  That’s my quiet time.  So I take a bath and read.  Since we’ve been staying home I’m not in a rush to get ready and go anywhere so I take longer reading. 

Well this past Sunday morning as I was reading in the tub, my husband got up, went downstairs to get himself something for breakfast and then came back upstairs to watch TV in the room we now call The Lounge.  It used to be one of the kids’ rooms, but when they all moved out we transformed it into a space for us … complete with a bigger TV, a closet system that now holds snacks and a bar, and some of our collections.  It’s one of our favorite rooms in the house.

He gets his breakfast, comes back upstairs, and parks himself in The Lounge where he proceeds to watch How It’s Made very loudly.  I fume for a few minutes, like I’ve done every other weekend morning when he’s done this, but then I realize I’m just making my life more complicated by not saying anything.

I yell (nicely) and ask if he can come close the bathroom door so I can read in quiet.  He suggests that he just close the door to The Lounge and I agree that it was a fantabulous idea. 

Problem solved … and all it took was me speaking up

I could have cut short my bath and reading time and done other things around the house, but I decided then and there that speaking up about my wants and needs was the right thing to do.

It kept me from being mad at him for not considering that I was reading before he turned on the TV and turned the volume up.  It kept me from ruminating on it the rest of the day.  It let him know what I needed and he (mostly) gladly agreed to comply with that.

Are there things in your life you need to speak up about? 

Are you wasting precious time and mental energy silently fuming when saying something could make a huge difference?

Maybe it’s time for you to simplify your life a little by speaking up.


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